I know I won't live forever, but at the same time, I bank on being able to evade death. Though I suppose it's terribly human of me to make no sense to myself sometimes.
[There's a small smile at that as he takes a drink.]
Trust me when I say that I'll be entertained by this no matter how long and weird and gross it can get.
I don't mind a little obsession, so long as when I come up in the downfall of others I'm one of the ones helping and not getting knocked off a pedestal. Good thoughts, though, are my favorite. I've got plenty of those about you, too.
A couple times. It's possible there's more than what I know about, but that one is harder to notice.
We were hired to break someone out of the Ice Court in Fjerda. Best way in was to ambush a prison cart and sneak onboard as prisoners. Which meant being stripped down once we were inside, so I swallowed packets of Wylan’s root bombs along with a pouch of chloropellets and an extra set of lockpicks. … I suppose it wasn’t actually that long of a story. Anyway, I had to vomit them up and swallow them back down a few times. Better to have them on hand if needed than not. [He hadn’t even been certain they would need all the times, but Kaz prefers to plan for any contingency he can.]
I have no desire to knock you off a pedestal, not that I put you on one myself. Which also isn’t personal. I don’t put anything or anyone on one. There are good thoughts, though.
“Do I contradict myself? Very well then, I contradict myself, I am large and I contain multitudes.”
[It seems a fitting quote to bring up right then.]
Being yourself is more than enough, you know. I wouldn’t be having you over to trade poetry books otherwise if your company wasn’t wanted. And at least you can rest assured that I’m not using you for any beguiling powers.
[He's quiet for a moment, remembering that day after he'd floated back to the harbor and watched his brother's body then drift back out to sea. On autopilot, he'd viciously attacked a rich-looking schoolboy leaving Rollins' sweetshop to steal his licorice, money, and trousers. Not to use the trousers, they were too big - no, he'd tossed the trousers in the ocean to stall the boy before he went wailing for help.]
Pickpocketing, I suppose. Though it's very closely tied to the time I started to teach myself finance. The lockpicking came just slightly later on from it, but not by much. They all overlapped.
It doesn't sound as though it was meant for just me.
I think they would be very suspicious and perturbed if I gave them love poetry. How about we simply talk and enjoy one another's company, without you having to do anything else for me? Giving me a room to shack up for the night is plenty, trust me.
I normally just let him wax on about our relationship.
[Life is so much easier when, after fighting, Jesper takes it upon himself to tell Kaz the fight is over and they're still brothers, so all Kaz has to do is say 'agreed' and move on with his life.]
Oh. I thought it was actively given on your part. I guess I don't really know how it works. I suppose I just wouldn't want you to think I'm spending time with you because you can do something for me.
[Kaz especially wants the women in his life to know that they can freely come and freely go, and that they owe him nothing for his time and attention.]
It is a very nice apartment. The shower was like a back and neck massage all in one.
[She would probably get along great with Jesper and his flirtatious nature.]
It can be sometimes. I can make it stronger with focus, but it's always there. Here I was thinking all your relationships were based on some level of mutual benefit.
[She chuckles.]
You're welcome to borrow my shower any time you are very sore. Shame to just hoard it away for myself.
In regards to work dynamics, there's certainly mutual benefits. If you do a job with me, you'll get paid your fair share. In regards to just using someone's skills and only giving them my companionship in return - that's not the sort of deals I'm interested in making.
So, are showers your favorite relatively modern invention, then?
I was trying to think of something that's been improved or invented while I've been alive. So, the last two decades and change. It's harder than anticipated. [Or he's more tired than he thought, one or the other.] Mapping systems have certainly improved over time. That's a pretty boring, if practical, answer though. Virtual libraries have also improved, but you'd expect that answer from me, anyway.
I don’t feel young most of the time. [It’s definitely the trauma. On the bright side though, his loved ones do at times help shed some of those ancient layers. Even with Stella he’s not above making jokes he might otherwise not. Like right now he cracks a little grin.] I’ve been legal in every sense of the word for a few years now, if that helps. And you’ve never once tried to borrow my cane to get me off your lawn.
I suppose you wisely wouldn't trust that I haven't got a doctored license to show as proof.
[Not that Kaz has to lie about his age, he's genuinely in his mid-twenties, but he certainly has many false identities to use for other reasons.]
A good thing then, as running with a drink in hand is no easy feat. [He takes another drink from his glass.] Do you think some experience can figuratively take off years, like some can add them on?
[Even though he can legally get into most places, that doesn't mean his name and reputation aren't a different barrier, or if not a barrier, then worth protecting.]
True enough, though coffee is worth the risk.
I more meant figurative than literal. Some experiences making one feel older than their years, and then other experiences or being around certain people making you feel younger. [He gives a small shrug.] It doesn't matter.
I suppose the first step in feeling young at heart would be to have a heart. Maybe I'll have to steal one sometime to check, I spent mine a long time ago on something more prudent.
[There's a glibness to his tone, an awareness that his dramatic talk is teasing as much as it is truth. While he can have most people believing his blood is pumped by greed and spite alone, those that know him well know that isn't entirely the case.]
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